Love is a Verb Day 11 ~~ Raising a Teenager Edition

Sometimes raising a teenager is just HARD work. I wrestle with wanting to do EVERYTHING for him to make sure it gets done. BUT.... he is 18. And there MUST come a moment when they sink or swim.... sigh. We just CAN'T do EVERYTHING for our babies mama's, especially when they are 18. double sigh.

So what in the world am I talking about? Scholarships. It is time for him to get scholarship applications in and some of them require essays. I've tried to get him to do it while he has been off for snow days, but he worked on it for a little bit and didn't get anything really done. I wanted to sit on him and MAKE him do it, but the Holy Spirit just wouldn't let me. This child MUST grow up and it is make or break it time for him. Triple sigh.

I love him so and I could fill out all the applications and then just have him write the essays, but how is that loving him well? If I do it all, what kind of feeling of accomplishment will he really have from having done it himself? Not much. The best lessons I have learned in life have come from me either doing something for myself or me not getting something done. Yes, some of the best lessons I've learned in life have come the hard way. Sometimes the REALLY hard way.

My sweet man reminded me last night of that and confirmed what the Holy Spirit had already been speaking to my heart. I am a well-Blessed woman....well-Blessed woman!!!!!

So having said all of this let me leave you with my dear Teenager whom I am TOTALLY smitten with. Even when we argue and fuss.......... I am still TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY SMITTEN with this sweet man boy (he will ALWAYS be my baby =)

OH RJ PLEASE TAKE NOTE OF THIS BEAUTIFUL SCARF!!! LOOK AT THIS BEAUTIFUL SCARF AROUND THIS GORGEOUS NECK!! THANK YOU AGAIN SO MUCH!! HE LOVES IT!!!!!


So mama's......my best advice on raising a teen is:LOVE THEM WELL THE WHOLE ENTIRE TIME THEY ARE IN YOUR HOUSEBECAUSE IT GOES SO VERY QUICKLY AND THEY WILL BE APPLYING FOR SCHOLARSHIPS AND YOU WILL BE WANTING THINGS TO.....S.....L....O....W.....D.....O.....W.....N.....

I have loved this child from the moment I found out I was pregnant. Through all the months of disappointment.....all the pills I had to take to ovulate (oversharing....sorry =) just so I could even get pregnant.....to finally after 62 hours of labor (yes you read that right) and almost losing him..........getting this precious boy into the world........I have loved him every.single.solitary.moment. And I love him still........

And how does he know? Well, I tell him ALL the time, but I also show him and I will be showing him by backing off and watching him fly. tear. double tear. I love him so!!!

Soar my baby boy........SOAR!!!

Proverbs 22:6 (NIV)

"Start children off on the way they should go,
and even when they are old they will not turn from it."

I love you all so ~~ have a beautiful day,

Random Friday ~~ The Truth is.... Edition ....

The Truth is...... "I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalm 139:14

The Truth is....."..You brought my life up from the pit, O LORD my God." Jonah 2:6b

The Truth is..... "If ever He loved me, He loves me forever." Pastor John - James River Assembly

So what is your Truth today? Are you holding onto The Way, The Truth and The Life or are you holding onto a poor substitution? hmmmm.........

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Last night I was working on Dak's Senior Scrapbook, and if anything will jump you right into the middle of your reality, it is working on your BABIES SENIOR Scrapbook!!! As I worked, I came to the page of his first day of school this year, his Senior Year (have I mentioned MY BABY IS A SENIOR?) anyway.....

A big part of Scrapbooking for me now is journaling; it is almost as big as the picture itself, for it tells the story behind the picture and we each have one....a story I mean.....behind our eyes..... our picture....you know.... anyway.....

As I came to that particular page to work on and came to the journaling part what stuck out to me is what we read on the first day of School.....yep Psalm 139. It is a tradition you know. So as I sat in my recliner and wrote these Words.....

"O LORD, You have searched me and You know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; You perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; You are familiar with all my ways." Psalm 139:1-3 .....

I thought about my dear son....nothing profound......nothing earth shaking.....just about him..... who he is.....about our times reading this Psalm together every first day of school.......and now we have read it together for the last time on the first day of a High School, Secondary or Elementary first day of school scale, but I'm not really sad....not really. He must grow up I know. I'm just trying to savor every.single.solitary.moment. And this Scrapbook is helping. I am thankful. God is SO good to me!!! So Good!!

The Truth is.... "Those who cling to worthless idol, forfeit the grace that could be theirs." Jonah 2:8

...... I never want to cling to anything worthless. As I travel this journey through life, I want to be pleasing to my Abba Father and NEVER want to forfeit the grace that is mine through Jesus Christ my Savior, in any area of my life, ever!! And that is the prayer for my son as well. I love this verse. This little tucked away verse that Jonah prayed, incidentally while he was in the belly of a fish......not so incidental huh? Powerful prayer he prayed...you can check it out in Jonah 2.

The Truth is..... I am trying to work out some things in my life right now and I'm trying to figure out what in the world to do with this knee!!! Last night I was walking to our office when I just started having pain.....my knee felt very tight so I knew it was swelling, I looked at it and the knot that sometimes shows up on the inside of my knee, off to the side was huge....I was irritated. Yep had to sit and ice, but it was in that quiet icing time that my fingers wrote out of the Psalms on a page I will always cherish.....it was a sweet moment and one I might not have had so profoundly had I not taken the time to sit....and breathe.....and ice.

Okay so a couple things before the Randomness ends for this Friday edition =) My Auntie Stella has started a blog. YAY!!! She is so sweet, and so GREAT!!.... I am VERY Blessed to have a wonderful relationship with my Auntie (my dad's baby sis) and I'd love for you to check her out right here. Show her some love.....follow her.....listen to her wise words.....share her life....and grow her way.....she is a beautiful person.

I don't often ask for prayer for this knee, because well, it is what it is.....or is it? I believe that God has a plan and a purpose, so would you please join me in prayer over what that plan and purpose might entail. Yes I would LOVE to be able to perform daily tasks pain free, but what I want most is His will. So if we need to start pursuing other avenues of treatment, I want to get on that. But ultimately I am in the passenger seat and not the driver's....so what God says and does.....goes. Thank you for joining me.

Father,

There is NONE like YOU and I praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. You are the best Father!!! Thank you for teaching me and showing me more of who You are. Grow me in You Lord and help me to be all that YOU created me to be. I love you ~~ Amen.

Have a Beautiful Weekend,

Effective Parenting....

I thought I would share the book that I am reading right now. This book is very insightful to what our teens are going through in this day and age.

The truth of the matter is, is that it is certainly a different world than 1983/1984 when I was a Senior, when the biggest issues I really faced were hand-me down clothes and pining over a certain boy....

Yes there were certainly other issues, but not nearly as prevalent as today. Today it seems that kids can get anything they want. The internet has made this a much different world for our kids.

So I am reading.........

And this book is really good. I'd like to "read" an exerpt:

"My effectiveness seems to be wrapped up in two challenges: creating a safe environment for discussion, and asking questions and listening without passing judgement."

I'm finding that this is so very important to my teen; to create a safe place for him to talk to me. When it comes to asking questions, it is asking the RIGHT questions, not just probing to get answers, but rather asking questions to keep in tune with your child, to give them a safe place to talk. And it is SO important that I must listen without passing judgement on him, and certainly keeping in mind that before I try to take the speck out of his eye, I must first get the plank out of my own.

In another place Mark writes: "Approach is everything. The demeanor of your approach will determine the demeanor of your teen's response. How do you approach your teen? With gentleness and humility..."

Right on Mark.....this has been an area that I have been lacking in at times, but I am understanding how important the approach is. It often times determines how the entire conversation goes....it is just that important. And approaching my child with gentleness and humility, even in the most difficult of conversations, gives him a safe place to discuss even sensitive issues.

This book has been really good so far.....next on my list is: "The Five Love Languages of Teenagers" by Gary Chapman. I'm looking forward to it as well.

Do you have any book suggestions for me? If so, please let me know. I'd love to hear your insight.

Have a Blessed day ~~