Tuesday, March 2, 2010


So one could say, that I have trouble focusing sometimes. One could say that. The reason that is would be because I tend to be on the creative side.

When I start something I have EXTREMELY good intentions on finishing in a timely manner, but often I flit off in another direction and the book goes unread for weeks, or even months, or the bathroom cleaning gets left for tomorrow. So one of the things that I am currently working on is focusing more on the things I have already started, and seeing those projects through to completion.

Which brings me to the book I picked back up again today: Beth Moores (should be an apostrophe, but blogger is crazy!!) "So Long Insecurity". This is a fascinating book and one that I am finding my name written all over. Anybody else feel that way? I find my self marking up this book and going through the online questions over at her blog here. It is fascinating I tell ya.

Here is an excerpt: "Insecurity refers to a profound sense of self-doubt -- a deep feeling of uncertainty about our basic worth and our place in the world.... The insecure man or woman lives in constant fear of rejection..."

This could be the definition of how I have felt much of my life.

So insecure about the way I talk. When I was a kid I had to go to Speech Therapy after school. It was awful. Back in those days... (hahaha) .... my therapist made me talk into a recorder and then she would play that mess back to me and tell me how awful I sounded and how I needed to do better. It was so hard. I hated the way I talked.

So insecure about my looks...the ugly dumpling.... always had permed, frizzy hair, chubby, BIG glasses and BIG hips. I was so unhappy with my looks, but I always tried to do the best with what I had. That was my thinking.

So insecure about just myself. I couldn't talk in public. I'd nearly throw up from the nervous stomach and I always thought myself SO uninteresting. I ALWAYS said the wrong thing, so it seemed to me. I had such an issue with myself.

I could go on and on, but you get the idea. And the constant fear of rejection would just cripple me sometimes. It caused such fear to set up in my life. It was crazy.

I tell you all those things about myself to tell you that God is SO BIG and SO GOOD!!! He totally has made a way for me through Christ!!! He has taught me (and is still teaching me) to be who He created me to be. The song by Jonny Diaz I just love: "More Beautiful You"

God has been teaching me that He has made me and you just the way we are and there cannot be a more beautiful you. You are just as He designed you to be. Isn't that cool? So enjoy his very interesting video of this song.

So I am totally working on focusing more, getting things accomplished in Him and totally being who He created me to be WITHOUT worrying about what others might think. That is hard for me because I am so sensitive. I want you to like me. (Yes I know, poor ole insecure thing =)

I love ya all ~~ have a Blessed evening,


  1. Dawn,

    Love the new header picture of your two favorite boys! Simply adorable. I too have had insecurities my whole life and it's sad when our parents are the ones who give them to us.

    In case you get the chance, stop by my blog today for a great opportunity to enter another giveaway I'm doing.

    Love and Hugs ~ Kat

  2. Do you suppose all women have the same issues of insecurity??? I'm so thankful that we can find our worth in the One who made us!!

  3. First - I have to tell you - your memory verse in 1 Timothy - I'm using that tonight in my lesson with the kiddos!! Thought that was cool when I saw it there!

    Second - insecurities... oh mercy friend - who doesnt have them... but yep, we're so hard on ourselves. We forget WHO we are in Christ - BEAUTIFUL Children of his... so hard to get someone to understand that though, isnt it. And I was one who had to go to speech therapy too for a lisp, so I relate to that - because when I stand in front of people to give a message, I feel the little twirks of my mind go back to when I was in elementary school sitting in front of a mirror watching my tongue.

    But let me remind you - you are BEAUTIFUL & amazing & everything God created you to be!!!

    Wonderful post my friend!
    Love & hugs!

  4. wow, what a great reminder!!! Thanks for sharing this! And you are so right, we are beautiful and wonderfully made ;) xoxo LA

  5. I love this song! At first I was all about it for my 13 year old kiddo but now I know it is for me too! So wierd but I have never much looked at the word insecurity to describe myself and yet I am so sure that is what I have been dealing with most of my life. I hope to get that book soon too. Thanks for sharing your heart my friend. Praying along side you, Hope